Monday, August 30, 2010

Smoke and Let Smoke

smoke and let smoke Often non smokers ask me …“Why Do you smoke …or... what is in smoking that you do it for??? 
this person never asks  this question again when i begin my lecture by stating, “you won’t know till you try it yourself”…

I further continue by adding;
Don’t tell me that a wiser man once said that “Cigarette: Fire and Fool on opposite ends while tobacco in between”. How did he know that the other person was a fool?? If my smoking bothers you my friend move your butt some place else and let me kill my self I am already smoking on the lower side i.e. i smoke one cigarette at a time.

Saturday, August 28, 2010

Saying Sorry to Your Boss

Sorry to boss In a working environment, unfortunately, we all end up having a Boss on our neck, whom majority of the subordinates do not like and call him names, mimic him to reduce the grudge that they have for him, but the despise/ rage and anger doesn’t subsides, rather it never ends as its an eternal feeling. For once in his life time, the boss is referred as “pain in the ass" by every subordinate. Employees often associate their routine life issues to the characteristics of their boss, like:
A Bad Boss is like an itch in your private parts the more you scratch the more itchier it gets. 
Another version of it goes like “a bad boss is like a diaper… always stuck on to your butt and full of _hit”

Tuesday, August 24, 2010

5 Essentials of a Good Employee

Good Employee Bad Employee There are people who religiously do exercise and they do not enjoy their day if they miss out on it, likewise there are people who do not do engage themselves in any sort of physical activity and if they are asked to add it in to their daily routine they adapt to this change but with great resistance. Similarly, there are certain routine exercises to be followed as an employee, from the inception to enjoy your role as a good employee.

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Comparing Two or More Job Offers

Comparing 2 or more Jobs Remember: One should compare all aspects of the job offers.
Let’s say you got 3 offers after all the hard work and preparation. Now the time comes that you have to decide and evaluate one out of them as best offer.

Monday, August 16, 2010

Confession of a Dying Man

Deathbed Lying on my bed I can hear the call of the death angel that he is closing distance on me and soon my soul will leave this ephemeral existence. I am feeling so powerless in entirety, that I can not even put my fingers in my ears to stops these voices. I know, my breaths are limited and there are so many things left incomplete, but now the only important thing is to seek forgiveness from GOD so that I die in peace.  BUT

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Salary Negotiation Don’ts

Salary Negotiations Knowing the salary negotiation tactics is very essential, whether you are new to job hunting or an experienced individual. The art of negotiation aids to achieve the salary target that you wish and deserve.

The article focuses on what to avoid when negotiating one’s salary package.

Monday, August 9, 2010

Murder by Marriage!!! :)

murder by marriage I saw this newly married couple, in a mall, smiling every other moment for no good reason, walking hand in hand, pointing at items, giggling in such a manner that to me felt as if they were seeking attention of others around them, with a purpose to give them a glance, envy the sweat between their palm and the look they give one another when they smile.
Alas! they didn’t know, “When a newly married couple smiles every one knows why, when they do the same after 10 years, every one wonders why”

Friday, August 6, 2010

Problem Solving Tricks

 MMmh! we often end up finding our selves in misery where for a time being we curse ourselves for landing in to that crap where no immediate “butt saving” solution is available and 99% of the times this problem was the last thing you wanted. No worries… repeat the mantra “A for apple… B for Ball” 100 times, after your end up reading the text below :)

The first thing to need to do, is to know the fact that you are the only one who will find the solution to this problem, because if you don’t its your butt any ways which is on line… so start believing in your self. 

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Common Interview Questions

Common Interview Questions

Interview is an opportunity to prove yourself to the interviewer that you are the right person for the job. Majority of the interviews are composed of certain predictable questions and the key to impress the interviewer is to give better answer then the any other candidate.
To impress the interviewer, one must:

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

First Interview: The First Opportunity

www.zaheerwaheed.blogspot.comOR Job Interview
So, the way you presented yourself via your CV charmed the audience and you got the interview call. This is like being invited at a welcome dinner by the neighbor next door, and if you a good enough they you both are going to see one another quite often.
One hears different statements about job interviews, e.g.:
· Interviews decides in the first 5 minutes if they want you in or not
· First impression is the last impression
· Learn as much as you can about the company
· They love confusing the candidate
· Quickly answering the questions is the key
Some of them make sense but the interview game is not about getting every question right rather a successful interview is all about presenting oneself in the most authentic way to the interviewer.
The key is to make those few minutes of conversation enjoyable, stimulating and informative for both the parties.
Preparing for the Interview:
Following are few steps that release the tension and help you get you confidence when to sit in front of the interviewer
1.    Brush up your knowledge on those bits of you that match to the job description, this helps to you in your best, however be prepared to be questioned on   areas that do not relate to the job. In the latter case, if you do not know the answer for the love of God and money do not pretend that you know, the person in front must have plenty of experience of interviewing and may easily sense a lie coming out and lying is a sure recipe for disaster.
2. Look at their website: an organization cares about its website and in the current global village situation a website is a key tool for existence. Go thoroughly through the contents of the website to and “think” about these things
i. What does the website tell about the organization?
ii. What are the key elements of their existence?
iii. What are the current news of the industry and its impact on the company?
iv. How well are they established?
v. Who are their competitors?
vi. What makes you want to work for them?
3. Lying… not at good idea at all, they have a trait of biting back. When under pressure and lying to the interviewer it can easily be sensed.
So what to do if not to lie, tell the truth… :)
But this truth is to be routed through a proper channel because many a times an interviewer doesn’t expects the candidate to be too straightforward. J
So when you feel that the question is taking you to a corner, it advisable to buy your self some time – “I need some time to think about it”
If you do not know any thing, and when asked about it is advisable not to say “NO, I do not have any idea about it”, it doesn’t leave a good impression rather you can switch that unfavorable ignorance points in to favorable eager to learn points by saying: “I do not know about it or have never gained experience about it but it is some thing that I would like to master if given a chance”
4. Be presentable, get you dressed pressed, shoes ready, shave / trim the facial hair, go through the road map to know the location, these all are soft aspects but if missed they have their adverse impacts one of which is that you start cursing your self.
5. Handling the pressure at first interview:

People describe this pressure as worse then their first date; the problem is being your self under such sort of pressure.
There is a trick that helps to reduce the pressure. simple, give a good interview and the following are some will help:
    a. Apply to more jobs, if you have another interview lined up there will be less pressure
    b. Wear some thing formal and most importantly that is comfortable to you.
    c. Be prepared for the classic opening questions like:
I. Tell us about your self
II. What have you been doing lately?
III. What made you apply to this job?
6. Highly likely one of the following shall be asked
a. What attracted you to our company?
b. Why do you want to work for our company?
c. What do you see as your strengths and weaknesses?
d. How do you see yourself in “xx” years time?
e. How do you like to work?
f. What can you bring to our compnay?
g. Why should we employ you?
h. What do you do outside work?
Have at least one question that is based on the information provided on their website / broacher, it leaves a good impression
7. Remember you have the right to ask too, there is nothing wrong if you ask!!
a. What systems are in place?
b. What are the qualities they are looking for?
8. Leaving the interview well: even if the interview went a disaster, do smile to all of them as you leave, act as it has been a good session and say good bye to every one.
9. Got through the interview, what else: Interview follow up
At the end of the interview if it is not told that by what time they will get back to you it is advisable to ask, this act at least tell you the time frame they require to take a decision.
One follow up call is allowable because more then that seems like pestering.
If you do not make it and curious about it, phone up and get feed back. It will help you in the next interview.
Go and pin a star in your interview!!

Still Confused ??? :(  Don't worry Job Interviews for Dummies will further boost your confidence 

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Who Scratched My Car ???

So if title was intriguing, and you came for finding the culprit … Alas!!! all i have, what is to follow, are just doubts.
I just wish that, for once in my life, if i find a person doing graffiti to any car… on behalf of all the suffering humanity I will pluck every hair out of his body starting from his eye lids… with great pleasure.
scrathed my car

Sunday, August 1, 2010

Marriage = Gamble + Job

Why I am writing it I don’t know and how I came up with this analogy and equation goes back to my discussion during lunch hour with my colleagues (SEEMA and SHAZI).
“All marriages are happy. It's the living together afterward that causes all the trouble.” -Raymond Hull 
This piece of writing has specially been written from weaker sex perspective, while men are more then welcome to read where I feel they lack :(.
Marriage is Gamble