Often non smokers ask me …“Why Do you smoke …or... what is in smoking that you do it for???
this person never asks this question again when i begin my lecture by stating, “you won’t know till you try it yourself”…
I further continue by adding;
Don’t tell me that a wiser man once said that “Cigarette: Fire and Fool on opposite ends while tobacco in between”. How did he know that the other person was a fool?? If my smoking bothers you my friend move your butt some place else and let me kill my self I am already smoking on the lower side i.e. i smoke one cigarette at a time.
PLUS, kindly take account of the following:
1. Why not to quit smoking… if smokers quit then who the hell is going to fight for cancer plus an added advantage of smoking is that it restrains the population to grow… eventually a smoker is population friendly being.
2. Smokers exists and exerts himself for well being of others: an implied oath of every smoker “I will contribute in eradicating the tobacco consumption from the face of the world, till my last breath”
3. Smokers talk less: where people end up gossiping… bragging… and other verbal diarrhea activities we smoke… thus less of sins and even then we don’t wish to go to heaven because where would we light up our cigarettes from… since the fire resides in the domain of devil.
4. Smokers are Fighters: No one can kill them… so we end up putting a ransom (in installments) on our name. Plus the phrase “you are not a quitter” echoes in every smoker’s mind and keeps him motivated… to not to be a Quitter.
5. Smoking aid weight loss: one lung at a time
6. Smokers are Intellectuals: Smokers have amazing mental power and the fuel for thought provoking actions is cigarette / cigar etc. Thus till the time a smoker smokes … he thinks (multi tasking)
7. Smoking is a Healthy activity: Smokers die young.
8. Smokers are “equal opportunity” employers: Who pays for the salary of cancer specialists and his team??? as they say… Cancer cures smoking… plus … many statisticians see us as the reasons for their employment.
Now you know smokers R a blessing in disguise for you non smokers!!!
Lastly why i smoke?
Smoking helps to make new friends:
I am not good with people specially when it comes to socializing at events or getting adjusted in a new environment… i often struggle to say the right sentence to get the conversation going especially when its a female :( … this is where smoking makes things easier… “Do you have a light?” (even if i have one in my pocket)…what ever the answer [Yes / No/ i don;t smoke] … the ice has been broken :) if i tend to feel that the conversation is not going any where… i excuse my self to smoke in open air… i.e. to look for a new friend.
Still want to quit smoking… keep your cigarettes wet, always keep your wallet empty and the most important thing be friends with non-smokers and for the time being…
Let me smoke I need a break and Seriously this is not my last one :)
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